Here's kind of how the day went:
11:30AM - decided to get off the computer and have some broth. Maybe that would help me feel a little less so-hungry-I-could-eat-a-whole-extra-large-pizza feeling I had going on. Heated it up and it looked like pee. Drank it anyway, and it tasted amaze-balls.
12:00PM - changed into my workout gear, thought maybe it would be OK to just go lift some weights, no cardio or anything like that. Got dizzy after putting my shoes on, decided it wasn't my best idea.
12:15PM - Put on sweats, easier to remove when the unstoppable lava-like butt barfing begins.
12:30PM - Gathered up a few things to mail, made a short list of things I needed at the store (what the f@!k was I thinking going to a place with FOOD) and headed out the door.
12:45 - Arrived at Fred Meyer with list in hand. Found myself staring at all the fried chicken and frog eye salad at the deli counter while a small stream of drool fell from the corner of my mouth. I tore myself away and ran through the store as quickly as possible. Unfortunately my trip to the store wasn't nearly as painful as my trip to the Pizza Parlor.
1:00PM - Walked into Papa's Pizza to pick up the donation check from fundraiser we recently did. The smell of their pizza buffet nearly brought me to my knees. I had to wait just inches away from the most glorious display of heat lamp warmed coagulated left over pizza slices that never looked so good to me in my life. All I wanted to do was escape from this hell but it turns out I had to run back outside to grab my drivers license. Who knew they wanted picture ID to verify I am who I say I am before handing over a very large check.
1:15PM - Ran to the bank, figured it would be a quick and painless adventure, no food there right? Coincidentally they share a wall with Panda Express and once again the overwhelming urge to say f%&k it and eat everything it sight nearly overtook my better judgement. I stayed the course and headed to the UPS store for an hour of my life I'll never get back. And I ended up not mailing all my packages because it was twice as much as going to the post office.
I had enough time to get gas, run home to refill my water and guzzle some more chicken broth before picking up my children who had been warned in the morning to be nice to me at the end of the day because I would be hungry and grumpy. Their only response was "Hope you don't take something fun away from us because you're mad" to which I, mother of the year, replied "well you've been warned so you'd better be nice or I will."
At 4PM sharp the prep officially began, and I opted to burn up my twitter account just for the hell of it. Here's the rundown: