Wednesday, August 8, 2012

The time has come...

The time has come to name the new girls.  I've got two more "inflations", today and next week and I feel that it is the appropriate moment to launch my "name the boobs" campaign on blogspot today.

Looking at the big picture I know that naming my new breasts isn't a very important thing to do.  Worrying about world peace, starving children in third world countries and the actual cure for cancer might be better things to expend my few remaining brain cells on.

But, alas, I'm just so focused on my breasts.  Ever since June 24, 2012 they are all that I can think about, talk about and worry about.

The fact that I am still not able to dress myself properly, clean my house (my toilets officially smell worse than the streets of midtown Manhattan in August) or do a single push up probably has something to do with that.

All that said, part of my healing journey has been to poke fun at things, things that make most people really uncomfortable with.  And that, my friends, that makes it all the more enjoyable for a twisted chick like me.  I love to watch people squirm when they find themselves laughing about something that in the back of their mind they know they probably shouldn't.

Once I made my announcement and asked for suggestions, I was blessed to receive a couple dozen or so names for the twins.  It was so fun seeing the things that people come up with, especially for something as trivial as naming fake boobies. 

And yet, laughter has such healing power that I think just looking forward to presenting the best of the best was enough to make me feel better, even when I thought I wanted to crawl back into some dark hole and pretend that I was really fine after all.

Make no mistake, I laugh, I tease and I joke.  And I hurt and I cry and I can't wait for this to be a distant memory.  But I'm going to do my best to make the best of this situation and laugh the hell out of every second of it that I can.

So please help me choose what has become almost as fun as picking out names for my kids, and vote for your favorite boob names, and for the love of all that is good and holy, please feel free to share this with friends and family. I'd hate to only have four votes, it would be like running for 8th grade class president all over again.  I'm in enough pain as it is, please help a sister out.


Lisa Harding said...

Thelma and Louise!!!

Shane said...

May West with a tatoo that says something like max inflation 35 psi. Or airbag warning symbols.

Gayle said...

Left Hand and Right Hand (from Lyle)
Place Hands Here (also from Lyle!)
Lucy and Ethel
Salt and Lime (Lyle again. Can you tell?)
Thing 1 and Thing 2