Well I really hate to bring up the old anxiety & depression thing, but I just have to vent. It's either blather about it on my blog or end up paying for therapy. So to be fiscally responsible I'll trouble the rest of the world with my woes.
So today we had to go shopping and unfortunately that means that we ended up at Walmart (there's that fiscally responsible thing with the economy these days). I don't really know why, and can't quite explain, but going to Walmart gives me an anxiety attack. Every stinking time.
I swear. Like a sumo wrestler standing on my chest. And the closer we get to the store, the worse it gets. So while we're there I see about a dozen people I know, and to add to my stress I haven't showered (ew, gross I know but it is Saturday and the kids were up first okay?), I have no makeup on and my kids are completely out of control. Must be something in the air there....
And really, for me, the absolute WORST thing is that all I want to do is have a glass of wine to relax! I either have to sleep or drink to get that anxiety feeling to go away. And I can't drink because, well a depressant like alcohol sort of negates the whole ANTI-depressant thing so I am screwed.
I remember my therapist saying that the trick to making it go away is to know what you are anxious about. So what the hell could I be anxious about going to the fricken grocery store for anyway? Oh no, the bananas are going to be too yellow. Gosh, they'll run out of cheap canned goods. Darnit all, they won't have my size of plastic shoes for gardening.
So as I am walking around the store, huffing and puffing and trying to get air into and out of my lungs and trying to hide from people I know I decided what the hell, I'll get a bottle of wine for tonight. I get to the wine section and BAM! Can't find anything I like. Because after all, I'm at Walmart for crap's sake. So, turn up the anxiety a notch. See? Vicious circle.
Saturday, February 7, 2009
Friday, February 6, 2009
A mother's right
Mother's have rights. Well, and they are always right. But anyway, the point is that my right as a mother is to tell really boring stories about my kids that I think are hilarious. So here goes:
Last night we were in the car making plans for when we got home. We discussed that we would eat dinner, have "learning time", take a tub and go to bed (boy do I know how to have fun!!).
The kids requested a joint tub, which I prefer not to do but since Mark is working late for the next month and a half I decided to suck it up and do them both at once. It isn't easier, just quicker. And I end up a little less wet since there's not two separate tubbings with two separate kids splashing me for 10 minutes each.
So Brady says, "Tee-tah, don't throw a dolphin at me this time."
Kaylee says, "Brother, I DIDN'T throw a dolphin at you." (exasperated sigh)
(brief pause)
"It was a humpback whale."
Geez Brady, don't ya know????
Last night we were in the car making plans for when we got home. We discussed that we would eat dinner, have "learning time", take a tub and go to bed (boy do I know how to have fun!!).
The kids requested a joint tub, which I prefer not to do but since Mark is working late for the next month and a half I decided to suck it up and do them both at once. It isn't easier, just quicker. And I end up a little less wet since there's not two separate tubbings with two separate kids splashing me for 10 minutes each.
So Brady says, "Tee-tah, don't throw a dolphin at me this time."
Kaylee says, "Brother, I DIDN'T throw a dolphin at you." (exasperated sigh)
(brief pause)
"It was a humpback whale."
Geez Brady, don't ya know????
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Jack of All Trades, Master of None
Further evidence that I have not one skill that I do overly well, but rather several that I can complete half-assed, today for an hour I re-painted several sections of my building that were damaged during flood-gate 2009.
And on the day the roof nearly caved in, I spent the better part of that day moving furniture and bailing out a 55 gallon garbage can. So, do you think these are skills or talents that should be listed on my resume?
I guess when I signed up for this job I had no idea that would mean I would have to learn the following:
And on the day the roof nearly caved in, I spent the better part of that day moving furniture and bailing out a 55 gallon garbage can. So, do you think these are skills or talents that should be listed on my resume?
I guess when I signed up for this job I had no idea that would mean I would have to learn the following:
- How to shovel snow from a sidewalk with a crappy aluminum shovel from 1985
- How to remove snow from a plow piled up at the end of aforementioned sidewalk with aforementioned crappy aluminum shovel
- How to avoid gagging excessively while cleaning up a flooded bathroom floor covered in chunky poop from some old lady who used our toilet as her own public restroom after drinking a gallon of morning coffee so she wouldn't plug the toilet in her own RV
- How to refrain from chasing down the old lady and beating her for not warning us that she clogged the damn toilet
- How to bang on the office window loud enough that the early morning traveler who just wants to take a piss in my bathroom but can't get in because we haven't opened yet doesn't whip it out and pee next to my desk outside while I am checking my email
Gosh, I really do have my dream job.
Monday, February 2, 2009
Punxsutawney Phil
F*#!ing groundhog. 6 more weeks of winter? More like 12 if you live in north freaking Idaho.
Sunday, February 1, 2009
Breaking news?
Wow, hot topic today in the media: Michael Phelps was photographed smoking pot. And this is a surprise? Didn't everyone see the kind of food the dude ate while training? Yeah, I know he burns a LOT of calories training, but come on. His next sponsorship gig? Doritos.
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