Childrens Law

This is similar to Murphys law, as in what can go wrong will go wrong, or something like that. Only not totally the same, but you know what I am getting at. I have discovered many over the years, but the most impactful to date have been over this weekend.

For example:

Law #1: No child sleeps in on weekends. Monday through Friday it takes a stick of dynamite to get either child out of bed and ready to leave for daycare. Saturday and Sunday, the ONLY TWO DAYS I CAN SLEEP IN, they both wake up at 6:30am. Happens every weekend.

Law #2: Children instinctively misbehave in restaurants. I am starting to think that taking children out to eat is a little like pregnancy and childbirth. The whole time you are thinking to yourself, "Why the hell did I get myself into this situation AGAIN" and then you kind of forget the misery and next thing you know you are either A) delivering a baby or in my case B) peeling your 2 year old off the sticky, nasty floor of your favorite dining establishment while throwing your credit card at the waitress so you can get out of there before they have to "help" you out the front door.

Law #3: Children do not want what they already have. Case in point: All grandparents chipped in for a GIANT outdoor playset. Over the past few weeks Mark has been putting it together. They have been step-by-step playing on things as they are complete. Slide & ladder first (lasted all of 5 minutes before moving on to the unattached rock climbing wall). Then they wanted to play on the wall until it was complete, then literally sat on the swings while we were trying to put them together. When those were done and there wasn't anything else handy to touch/sit on/grab/throw/play with, they went to the deck to play with all screws, nuts, bolts, washers, spare wood pieces and tools that they could find. Once we actually get the playset done, I really have no idea what they are going to want to do.

Well it's late (okay it is only 9pm, I am a wimp) so I think I'll stop there. I am certain that when we take our family vacation later this week I will have a few more laws to post as I will have the opportunity to view the behavior of 11 children ranging in age from 1 - 14, and I guess if you count parents anywhere from 34 - 65 as well. I may be drinking heavily on this vacation. It's not my family we are going with.....