Sunday, October 10, 2010


We all know that women are the ultimate multi-taskers.  We can talk on a cell phone, hold a screaming toddler on our hip, answer the door and stir a pot of stew all at once.  It is just in our nature, as result of years of subconscious training and practice.

Now, I don't want to offend any dudes out there, many of whom are also very capable of multi-tasking as well.  For example, Mark can watch football and eat potato chips at the same time, and even open his own beer bottle from time to time.  Yes, I know, I'm a lucky woman.

And almost all men multi-task during "sexy-time".  You cannot deny that sometimes you think about "other things" to "prolong" your, ahem, experience.  That my friends is ALSO multi-tasking.  Burping & farting at the same time, not so much.  That's more of just a beautiful gift from God, if you ask me.

The kind of multi-tasking I am really talking about is truly the ability to do three or more things simultaneously, without effort and without consciously doing so.  In observing both of my children this past summer I have been able to tell that Brady, God bless his sweet little boy heart, has a one-track mind. 

For now, his fixation is on all things to do with cars.  I do not look forward to when the pendulum swings over to girls, especially since his interest in his penis is starting to wan, and that thing has really been stretched to the limit, if you know what I mean.  Boys just don't seem to think about more than one thing at a time.  When there's food, they eat or practice distracting the nearest sibling, depending on how much they like the food you've prepared.

Girls, on the other hand, seem to be able to do at least two things at a time, unless there's a mirror nearby in which case they are rendered completely useless for doing anything but making faces at themselves.  Kaylee, for example, can play barbies and totally irritate the shit out of her brother all at once.  It's a gift, really.  She can also poop and read a book.  She can also twirl her hair and speak in coherent sentences.

But today I was the most proud of her I have ever been.  While at the lunch table, Kaylee performed a trifecta of multitasking.  While reading a recipe out loud and chewing her lunch, she managed to rattle off the most amazingly disgusting fart I have ever heard from her. 

As they say, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.....